Ambiguity
Ambiguous, like the dull colour of grey;
The not-quite-there air of a cold summer's day.
I cannot define what this feeling is,
Or even be sure that it really exists.
What is it that calls me; is drawing me in?
That comes ever nearer, yet never begins?
What name can you give what you cannot define?
A numbness, awareness, by fluke or design?
And how should I try to explain this to you?
That I so want to love you - don't know that I do?
And why does the ache that enshrouds me with doubt
Remain like a flame that you cannot put out.
Burning and scorching and hurting me so,
Taunted with ignorance - nothing I know!
Help me to banish ambiguous pain,
And help me discover if you feel the same.
© Jemma Hill
